Renewed

HELLO!

im posting this in the midst of my presentation meeting.. hah! anyway sorry cant stay for sharing and for missing yest's gathering! ): but for now, im really amazed at how God can change one sian, gloomy, stressful morning into a sunnier afternoon! (: haha.

actually i didnt wanna come for session today, but i went cos im the kind who'd feel guilty if i pon anything. ya so i'd go for everything though i may not want to la. but im glad i went for session. for the past wk, ive been feeling like i wanna just take a break from everything and just hide in a hole in the corner of the world. there's really too much things to handle la. and im abt to reach the 'really really cannot cope with everything' stage. its very very sian to have to keep trying to meet deadlines and when one thing is done have to go rush another project/assignment. really dunno why this sem is so stressful la. and seniors say next sem is worse. i can just prepare my cave in some faraway land already. yup. so tts y im so sian everyday and i think im becoming quite anti-social also. i dont even want to meet up with friends, don't want to go anywhere, i just want to come home right after school, like immediately after the lecture, go straight home.. and at home i dont even want to do work, i just stare at my work and sigh then go and slp without completing it. oh no, after typing all these out and reading them, i think these are like signs of depression or sth right? haha!

i realise im a very 'need people's approval' person, like if i want to dont go for session, i'd think abt how some ppl will wonder why im not there, and if my staying at home to finish up work is a good enough excuse to not go for sessions, and most of the time i would think its not a good enough excuse la, so if i really dun go for session i'd feel guilty. even just now when i left early, i was also feeling quite 'oh no, dunno what they would say of me.' and even worse if ppl ask me how come i didnt go for session or wat, i'd be very very suspicious of their intentions of asking me. i would be wondering if they're judging me or anything.
sigh. such a mafan mentality right?

but really, thank God for this weird mentality if not i wouldnt have gone for session. and if i hadnt gone for session i'd still be on my sad journey to looking for that cave or hole to hide in for the rest of the week.
and i wouldnt be feeling so refreshed! haha.

OH! and im so proud of our catholic faith! haha. so cool to have a SEA conference! really no boundaries to our faith! (: but sad! cant go.. its right smack in the middle of my exams! ):

ok.. back to work. haha.