God is good.....

i am so tired, thinking of taking a nap but i just cant sleep.. the whole event of the mass that i just attended was running in my mind n i cant stop but think about the whole celebration. it has been so long since dont know when, God Knows, that i feel connected with God at mass. Although i tell myself that i must try to see God at mass but things did not impact me at all. am i just too occupied with my own thoughts n ideology about things. Easter tridumn this yr, i looked forward to exp God in my life or even just to get a glimpse of God's love but that didnt happen. Easter vigil, theortically seems to be so meaningful with the darkness, the light of christ, the salvation history, the bells, the easter song, the allueia n the gloria but this yr i didnt strike me at all... i went in for mass hoping to get something out of it again i didnt.. why... i was panicking and i dont know what happen to me.. i was like how... sunday.. i am gg to be godpa to kendrick. how unprepared i am.. plus the recent appointment of being a core member... like arhh how can i be like this . . .o man.. is it school that has caused me to be like this... arhh... i dont know... questions like what marcus asked "do all of u feel high with God at mass", "wht is a christ encounter"..... they really haunt me.. i start to doubt.. why Christ has to die, why he is risen... arhh.... someone pls help me..

BUT today, at the baptism mass, everything was revealed to me. I literally can feel the spirit of God moving in the whole church despite being in a non aircon church, with a tie n long sleeve...i feel the peace and joy within my heart n the assurance once again that he is real n present in our lives. Fr paul homily was amazing as he said that God is risen n we are living our everlasting life now on earth. He also mentioned that the reason when pple served in ministries they act exp God in all the activites and how God works in all these areas. (that is what i remembered.. did i remember correctly???!!!)

When we entered into baptism.. wow. it strike me the most .. i tell u.. i literally was brought back to my own baptism n how have i said yes o God.. i also witness how so many pple are touched after the baptism.. how the pple around me like kendrick's journey kakis n himself were so excited for baptism... dont know what it entails.. that is the faith they desire.. the next quest i asked myself "where is my desire ?" i dont hav an ans to this quest but i was lifted up by their faith n action.... the whole celebration was so siginificant to me... i even witness adults tearing after baptism.. amazing.... i was so awed.. really awed.. i actuall stoned quite a bit at mass.. i dont know what to tell God.. hahaah hey are you all lost in my sharing... pls dont they are just vry random... just thought of sharing. I believe this exp has helped me to realised God's love for all of us n how pple desire to know him.

As i walked back from the train station, i was like wei... back to reality.. i just didnt want to come down from that estacy with the Lord.. slowly the thought o exams are creeping into my mind, when i josh msg me to ask me for physics past year paper. when my godson asked me where i am gg?? i said home ... to study?!?!? PHysics.. exams???? o man.. it is so real that i must lived my faith in the world n not contained it in a box.. i was like ok... hmm.....

Praise God for the experience . . . . . praise God for all my love ones, my friends like all of u....all the things that he has given me, blessed me with n are still giving me... Congrats Godson.... on the day of your baptism n confirmation.. hope that the conversation will slowly begin from ur heart.. that includes me too... hmm.. have to it my books now.. but i know that he will be with me..